TEN THINGS TO KILL AN ERECTION
I was flipping through channels the other night and caught a soft porn movie on Cinemax............OK you got me , I knew it was on. Even though it wasn't a good movie, I still like to watch. They are somewhat humorous in that the fucking is noticeably fake. Now don't get me wrong, it's still good enough to give me a hard-on. What is funny is how the guy just rubs his dick against her, no long thrust, no balls slapping her ass...Nothing! My question is...How does he keep from getting a full blown rock hard woodie. If I was at the plate batting, I would be swinging some wood. There were two conclusions I came up with, either he is gay and not interested in women or he has tremendous mind control. Now at times, guys use a type of mind control to keep us from cumming too soon, so we don't dissatisfy you ladies. So,with the help of a fellow blogger we will discuss some ideas a guy can use.
****WARNING****
The following ideas when used improperly may cause erectile dysfunction
1. Think about sports: This is the one most guys use and it works pretty well, unless your a diehard fan that gets a hard on from sports.
2.Start an off the wall conversation: "Can you believe how well the Dow Jones is doing" or "I just read the best article on keeping slugs out of your garden."
3. Watch "The View"
4. Think about your school lunch lady, the one with the big mole...with the big black hairs coming out of it.
5. Imagine your parents having sex: Too much of this one may have you spending time on a couch.
6. Tape a picture of Flavor Flav to the back of her head.
7. Imagine your 80 year old Grandmother on stage at a strip club.
8. Think about the rape scene from Deliverance.
9. Rosie O'Donnell
10. Rosie O'Donnell nude covered in butter smelling like day old tuna.
posted by DRC at 10:52 PM
6 Comments:
The thinking about sports thing never did it for me. Maybe golf but in general thinking about sports makes my erection laugh and say try again Freaky.
Grandma on stage at the strip club may possibly invert my erection and cause severe psychological trauma.
I see a theme with Rosie O'Donnell. LOL!
The sports thing does not work for everybody, they accuse us in the south of doing it doggie style so both people can watch a NASCAR race. A picture of Rosie will keep slugs out of your garden also! or was that Martha Stewart, Hmmn
LOL @ doggie style so you can both watch NASCAR.
No, I'm pretty sure it is Rosie. She kills erections, appetites, and garden pests too. Why no one has figured out she's the boogeyman is beyond me.
My stomach turned with the thought of Rosie O'Donnell covered in butter, smelling like tuna. Thats just gross.
@B.Good My dick went limp for a week after writing that...serves me right doesn't it. That's just nasty! LOL
Another hardon-killer is masculine women, as well as the noise of little snot-noses coming in from the sidewalk under your apartment window while you're trying to make love to your wife.
The rape scene from Deliverance may be an effective turn-off to small or weak or mousy men but some claim it got a few masculine men ranging from janitors and ditch-diggers to priests and CEOs and many others aroused.
Post a Comment
<< Home